She started October with so much hope, so much anticipation, she was eager to see the month play out and sum up the bits and pieces of its pictures. Well bummer! this was short lived for  she must have done something wrong, probably smiled too much or yes, of course, danced too much to the sweet songs October played.

Well she isn’t dancing anymore neither is she smiling, October didn’t like them, October preferred she stayed mellow her energy was spoiling October’s flow.

She started October with great expectations, she could literally feel her heart bursting with joy at the thought of the coming of her expectations, and she was ready to let October bless her with October’s sweetness, shower her with October’s love and hug her with October’s kindness.

So she loved a little more, accepted people a little more, played a little more…but you see she must have done something wrong, she probably went overboard with this one. October couldn’t handle this new energy; she had to cut it down.

Well she isn’t playing so much now, not letting everyone in anymore and definitely not loving …for you see October needed a lonely fellow

She started October with good friends, with beautiful families, hopeful for greater moments. She would sing endlessly, grin from ear to ear, and blow her trumpet to anyone eager to hear her tale. She was ready to see October through, as October seemed to be delighted. Nah October wasn’t, October’s happiness was false…An illusion.

Well, you sure can’t see her grin anymore, silence the new sound of her trumpet, throat clogged…no more singing..October got overwhelmed by it all.


So here we are again of how another month has been unfair to this amazing exceptional soul

Even birth month hasn’t been fair in the love affair either

Months have come with their different turmoil and stirred her like stew

They have filled beautiful eyes with drops of pain, constant pain

Never letting the pain wear off before the next month comes raging in


So…..here is her plan…..


She will rise up, over and over again

Over and over and over she will rise and over again she will fight

She will Smile at the ache; laugh at the pain, even with head spinning she will be brave

She will learn to breath all over again on her own

She will limp, even as each limp sends mind blowing pain all over her body, soul

She will limp, and limp, and limp until she learns to walk again, rising to be stronger in spite of it all

She will accept support in spite of her mind telling to shut all out


And then….

She will pretend to smile

She will pretend to laugh

She will pretend to be happy

She will pretend to be strong and even brave

Until the pretense becomes real.




So a friend shared this song “RISE UP by ANDRA DAY”and I couldn’t help but be inspired.

It basically talks about rising in spite of how we feel, in spite of the pain, betrayal, turmoil, or brokenness.

The important thing here is that we can’t do this all on our own, God has placed people in our lives to walk this pain together and then only can we heal the right way and rise up unafraid and brave. So in spite of how many times we fall, in spite of how many times we are betrayed, in spite of all the pain, we are brave people and even braver and stronger when we walk together through it.

In all I have said, please feel free to scream, till all you feel is pain in the pit of your stomach

Please let the tears flow freely

Feel the pain and the hurt

Feel the betrayal, even pour out your heart to God, He expects nothing less

But when all this is said and done, kindly pick yourself up, piece by piece scattered about

And rise up from it all

You will see you are stronger than you thought

Braver and definitely a fighter…(God loves fighters)

But in all this keep in mind that we need each other.

So let me help, let her help, let him help…


She will find her voice and strength again! And you can too…


Stay Beautiful Always…



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God, lifestyle, and so much more....

The Belle Jar

"Let me live, love and say it well in good sentences." - Sylvia Plath


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